Amy Lu's View

I don’t know who I would be without the song “Back on The Chain Gang” by The Pretenders. I’ve been singing it (not necessarily well) for the last 5 years with all the various incarnations of our band, “Pigeons From Hell.” (Band anniversary coming up in June! We are on band lineup version 4.0 now). In fact, our band name comes from one of the lyrics:

“Circumstance beyond our control,

The phone, the TV, the news of the world,

Got in our house like a pigeon from hell,

Threw sand in our eyes and descended like flies.”

–from “Back on the Chain Gang,” by Chrissie Hynde

Whoa, those words just keep getting more and more meaningful.

My latest attempt to bring “Back on the Chain Gang” to life was last night when I performed it for our church’s virtual coffee house. Actually, my most recent performance was this afternoon when I filmed myself playing it so I could post it here and on my friend Dan’s Open Mic Facebook page:.

This is the first time I’ve played and sang the song solo without the Pigeons to prop me up, and it was terrifying. My hands were shaking so hard last night, even though I knew I had a super sweet and chill and supportive audience. But the fear is precisely why I wanted to do it–if you can’t take risks and make an ass of yourself at the End of the World, when can you? Plus, I’m an adrenaline junkie and performing is how I get my kicks.

(Speaking of being willing to risk not looking awesome, I almost didn’t post this video because it’s so unflattering…but looking haggard and puffy during quarantine just adds to emotional impact, right?)

I had to keep the keys super simple because 1) I’m not that skilled of a keyboard player and 2) I’m not that strong of a singer and 3) Combining singing with playing piano can cause me to freeze up. A couple of years ago I took piano and singing lessons and during my recital song (“City of Stars”) there were measures where I was only able to play one note. But I did keep playing!

I’m definitely a much more confident and stronger drummer than keyboardist. I did have years and years of piano lessons as a kid and there was a time when I was pretty good, but I didn’t keep it up and it definitely hasn’t come back to me like drumming has. Still, I enjoy it and I am getting better (if not good) and it’s definitely easier to sing a song solo if I accompany myself on keys rather than drums. Hmmm, honestly I guess I haven’t tried a drum solo while singing, although I have occassionally sang while playing drums with a band.

Ah, playing with a band…Man, I miss playing with other people! I miss my peeps from Pigeons From Hell (new and old), Clusterflock, and Church Key. I miss being able to get together and make music IRL, at practice and for performances! One of the very last out-in-the-world things we got to do was perform with Pigeons From Hell at the Acadia.

I love that I’m still able to make music and that I’m getting to stretch myself with singing and being solo, and I love virtual coffee houses and open mics for the opportunity. But I hope I’ve learned not to take playing with others and for others who are in the same space as me (no matter how small or indifferent the audience) for granted.