Amy Lu's View

When Chad proposed to me, my response was, “You’re kidding.” [Note from Chad: She also gave a little laugh].

I’m not proud of this, but it’s the truth, and I feel like it’s time to go on the record with “the rest of the story” (to quote Paul Harvey, icon of my childhood). Actually, I’m surprised that I haven’t already blogged about this–if I have, I can’t find it.

(Quick recap, in case you’ve missed it–Chad proposed to me in his beautifully-written column for the Marion, Iowa newspaper on December 23, 1993).

So what in the world was I thinking?

In the weeks leading up to Chad’s proposal, I was frustrated, confused, and homesick. We had just moved to Marion, Iowa, a couple of months earlier and I missed my family and didn’t feel like I had created new connections yet in our new home. I didn’t think Chad, as a proper young liberal, “believed” in marriage (wasn’t sure I, as a bona fide young feminist, did, either) and I really didn’t know what I was doing with my life as new college graduate or what we were doing as couple.

We even had a fight a few weeks before Chad proposed because I basically told him I was going home for Christmas and didn’t really care what his holiday plans were. He told me I couldn’t do that and that we needed to spend Christmas together but didn’t give me a “good” reason (because he had already bought my engagement ring and was working on his incredibly romantic surprise).

I really was stunned by and completely unprepared for Chad’s proposal. I was quite insecure in myself, in us, and in life. So that swirl of emotions got conveyed in a blurted “You’re kidding!” (I also couldn’t quite wrap my head around Chad printing his proposal in his newspaper column in the real newspaper–I briefly thought maybe it was a copy of the paper only for me).

To top it all off, Chad was really sick with strep throat, and we didn’t have insurance so he didn’t see a doctor.

So in some ways, an extremely romantic proposal was actually pretty unromantic (yes, because of me). But, I actually think that makes it more romantic. I don’t believe in fate or destiny or that Chad is “The One” for me–I don’t think there is “The One” for anyone. But I am so grateful that we each decided that we would try to build a life with THIS one.