Amy Lu's View

I left my phone at Target. 

I think I would have been happier if I had left my heart. 

I’m surprised by how deflated I feel. Frustrated? Absolutely. Annoyed? Totally. 

But I almost feel sad, which seems a little off base. 

I don’t think I’m sad because I’m uber attached to my phone, but because this was a completely preventable calamity. I was a dumbass who was careless, and I don’t like that feeling.

I also don’t like feeling that someone picked up my phone and didn’t return it (we were able to track my phone from Target as it went on a bit of an expedition. Yes, we erased the phone so no one should be able to do anything nefarious with it).

And yeah, I AM pretty attached to my phone. Luckily, I’m able to use my old phone to listen to audiobooks via Audible. I guess I can use our Chromebook for most of my interweb needs. But I probably will be less communicative and–GASP–the world will be temporarily deprived of Amy selfies. 

I may even use this time of making do without a current smart phone to reevaluate my smart phone dependency. Perhaps I will learn to focus more and live more in the moment without constantly looking at my phone for the next dopamine hit.

Perhaps…but I’m not too optmistic.

I DO have a new phone on order (thanks to Chad for taking of that) even though I don’t feel like I deserve one (do the Germans have a special word for being depressed by your own dumbness? Seems like the people who came up with “schadenfreude” would).

I’m also bummed because this was supposed to be a special day–the day we got our new refrigerator. (Fittingly, today is actually the “National Day of Joy.“) And while we did successfully get our new refrigerator delivered and installed, this joy in being able to buy and store eggs and salad is tarnished by not being able to photographically document it.

I’m sure I’ll continue to wallow for a bit about the fate of my phone but I’ll get over it…eventually my melancholy will be replaced with rage as I try to learn how to use my new phone.