Amy Lu's View

The morning started out just like most mornings do. I got up, went on a run, took a quick shower. No signs that something was out of the ordinary. Nothing to indicate that I was about to embark on an emotional journey. 

And then I opened the air fryer to put in a frozen waffle for Chad…and saw there was ALREADY food in the air fryer. 

Emotions rushed through me in a cascade: 

• Confusion: What was this? Who had already been using our air fryer? Weird and strangely specific break-in to use our air fryer but leave the food behind. 
• Identification: These are some breaded faux chicken filets and some vegetarian pizza rolls.
• Realization: Chad left this in the air fryer last night…
• Disbelief: HE FORGOT THAT HE MADE FOOD IN THE AIR FRYER AND LEFT IT THERE WITHOUT EATING IT?!!!
• Anger: HE FORGOT THAT HE MADE FOOD IN THE AIR FRYER AND LEFT IT THERE WITHOUT EATING IT!!!
• More confusion: HOW could he forget about food he made in the air fryer…
• Sadness and despair: This food was abandoned in the air fryer and must now be thrown out.
• More anger: NOW THIS FOOD IS GOING TO WASTE!!
• Disgust: As Chad says “Oh well, I can eat that for lunch.”
• Resolve/moral outrage: ”Hell no, you are NOT eating this after it’s been unrefrigerated all night! You are NOT getting food poisoning on my watch.”
• Resignation/despair (as I threw the food into the compost): This food is going to waste…
• Doubt/regret: Should I have let him eat this? Is it fine? I really hate wasting food.

This great Air Fryer Incident of July 2024 was a perfect storm of differences between Chad and I coming into conflict:

• I really value eating. Chad does not. I really can’t fathom how Chad could forget to eat supper (okay, he had a small part of supper that came from the microwave not the air fryer so he didn’t forget to eat completely but this was the main part of his meal).
• I HATE wasting food. One of my biggest pet peeves (and that seems too mild of a phrase for it) is when someone in a movie makes a meal but it never ends up being eaten because the couple have sex instead. I’d like to at least see the characters come back and eat their food after they’ve had sex. Chad’s not pro food waste, but he doesn’t think it’s the end of the world. Plus, he was totally willing to not waste the food and eat it for lunch but…
• I don’t want to take chances with food going bad because it’s been out too long, and my window of safety is much smaller than Chad’s. Maybe I took high school home ec too seriously, but I definitely want to err on the side of caution. 

I assume most humans find themselves in a situation where they are completely mystified and irritated by someone important to them–spouse, coworker, parent or child, bandmate, sibling, friend. Our relationships and connections are all funny and ridiculous and beautiful. It’s amazing and inspiring that we can live together (sometimes in the same home) even though we drive each other nuts. 

To give my twist on the stages of grief made famous by Elizabeth Kubler Ross, my stages/cycle of exasperation has to include gratitude. 

And also…Opportunity…Hey…this is CONTENT! I can blog about this! (Yes, I did get Chad’s permission to blog about this. I think he doesn’t care because he’s pretty sure I come off as the unhinged one).